Why Is 28 The New 16?

So here I am in my late 20's and I feel like it is picture day on the first day of high school all over again. I am suffering from adult acne. Zits, pimples, blemishes, blackheads, whiteheads, call them what you want, I had a horrible breakout this week. Perhaps due to stress or depression or maybe the weather change, who knows.

To make matters worse, the breakout only adds to my stress, which causes me to breakout even more. What a vicious cycle.

What's worse is that adults are just as cruel as kids. I mean I felt the stares from people at work, on the train and at the gym. Oh the gym, what a horrible place with all its mirrored surfaces. I couldn't even hide from my ugly mug.

I spent over one hour in the drugstore last night attempting to find the magic cure that would clear up my skin. I am sure one product works as well as the next but I hoped to make an educated purchase. Where is “consumer reports” when you need them? I mean you hear all the testimonials on the TV infomercials for that wonder treatment (you know the one used by Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson and even P. Diddy). But does it really work? Does any of it work?

I settled on a face wash with salicylic acid, a honey and vitamin C facemask, and a spot cream with 10 % benzoyl peroxide. Hopefully my face will cooperate and I’ll be able to face the world again. Or perhaps it will just get worse from all those scary chemicals.

I Got Dumped

So Saturday afternoon brought me some interesting news. Perhaps you have read in previous posts that I was "dating" someone for the past few months. I use that word in the purest sense as we were in fact going on dates. No official commitment had been spoken of or made as of yet.

My intuition is strong and I knew something was up over the three few weeks. I mentioned before that I was miffed that I had not been included in any of his plans while he had friends in from out of town. And the icing on the cake was last Saturday at his birthday party, where not one of his friends had the moment of recognition when I was introduced to them. "Oh this is Pablo!" was not exclaimed once at the party. So I knew something was up. I mean not to toot my own horn, but "honk!" - I am someone you want to bring home to mom and dad and introduce to the whole damn family for that matter. But not in this case.

So flash forward to this weekend. We tentatively made plans for Saturday...after a week long of excuses: I am tired, I have a migraine, you get the picture...he says on Friday that we should do dinner Saturday night. Ok, I say. Well Saturday comes along and by 2 pm, not a word is heard from the asshole. So I call, as I am not in the mood for games. After much hemming and hawing, and more excuses he reveals that he doesn't have time for me and that he has made other plans for the evening with a friend. As I said I am not stupid and just boldly say, "I don't think you want to see me anymore!" Silence is heard on the other side of the phone, crickets chirping! I promptly fill the void, and ask "Could you please just be honest and tell me what's up?"

Again silence, and finally he says that he wants to talk, but would rather do it in person, "Wouldn't that be better?" To which I reply, “The phone works well and I am not in the mood to wait till we see each other to hear your news!” (which I already know is that I am about to get the we aren't going to work out speech. So I finally get him to spit it out: he doesn't feel an emotional connection to me, and knows that I am looking for more than just a fuck buddy.

So there it is, I am being dumped. How can this be...? I don't get dumped, I do the dumping. I can list a hundred reason why this relationship wasn't working from my side. But he gets the upper-hand and does the dumping first, damn him!

Why I Wanna Be Mediocre

So I guess I have no talent for scouting models because all of my picks this year on ANTM have been booted off already. I am disappointed with myself!

Wait, hold up! Let's talk about the real problem here. And it's not me! The judges on ANTM have lost their collective mind this year.

Last night Lisa (the misunderstood eccentric) was booted off the show. The mere fact that she was in the bottom two was a shocker. She has been doing so well through out the whole process. Ok, I’ll admit she is a bit of a train wreck – but bottom line she took great pictures.

The part that takes the cake is what the judges said to her. To paraphrase: Should we go with the girl who gives us great photos (Lisa) but is obnoxiously eager to win this competition or the girl who gives us mediocre photos (Jayla) and is kind of blah about this whole process? And believe it or not mediocre won. Proving that good gals never win.

I am going to apply this newfound knowledge to my own life. I've wondered why I have not been able to land a good job...It is because I am smart, skilled and talented. From now on, I am going to strive to be more mediocre.

That's What Friends Are For

I hesitate to post this, as the only people who read my blog are my friends. That said, I am so over my friends right now (you know who you are!).

I love you all, but seriously cut a brother some slack. Where is the love and support? Oh yeah, one more thing, get it together people! Enough said!

London Bound

No, I am not headed for the UK, but the girls on ANTM are (were) after last night's episode. The show featured a brief appearance from Eva "the diva" Pigford. I love that she has fallen right into place as a spokesperson, motivational speaker and all around nice girl. She was very inspirational to watch. Ok you know me I can’t say all nice things…I must add she looked great in that wig (the long straight hair) compared to that nasty short haircut she tries to rock.

The episode also featured a cameo from the guys of MTV's Jack Ass. Lisa seemed to be the missing cast mate as she fit right in with their crazy antics. I could not stop laughing when she put on a diaper and actually "used it" if you know what I mean. She is such a train wreck; I just can't stop watching her.

By shows end, I thought for sure that Nicole and Jayla were both going home, they both annoy me so. Funny lady Tyra Banks played a joke on them and no one was sent home. Everyone gets to go to London - Why London? Do they even have a fashion week?

This year’s panel is boring me. Special note to Executive Producer Ken Mok: Bring Back Janice!!! Twiggy is so blah. Miss J is just a one-note pony (ok we get it you’re a Tranny!). My FH (future husband), Nigel, however can do no wrong (well except for the liking girls part).
I seriously can't pick a winner yet. I'll be shocked if Kim wins. But you never know what can happen on ANTM. This feels like the season that will never end.

New Subject, Addendum

Ok, so moments after I posted the previous rant, the man calls and leaves a message. So I guess I am on his mind.

And going against what I said I wouldn’t do, I made mention of my issue (in true passive aggressive form). I asked, "Are you embarrassed by me?" To which he responded "No, why do you ask?" and I said, "Why haven't I met your friends yet?" To which he responded with a list of excuses about being busy this week with work, closing on a house, the theater, yada, yada, yada. And then he asked if I wanted to join them Saturday night for dinner.

I really should have just kept my mouth shut, cause it was like I had to ask to be included. Exactly what I didn't want to do. Is this how the whole relationship will go down?

To quote the musical Kiss Me Kate, "I Hate Men!"

New Subject

It is sad to say that if you stumbled blindly on to this blog you would think that the only thing going on in my life is ANTM. So I will take a short breather from the UPN wonder-kid and attempt to blog about something else. I Really do have other stuff going on in my life.

For example:
In the words of the Pussycat Dolls, "I don't need a man".

I was dating this guy for the past few weeks (nothing to serious, just the beginning stages). We had real dates as well as sleepovers (only at his place though -- he's a size queens! He will only sleep in a King Size bed). Beginning last weekend, he has houseguests. And while he has a large apartment, it is only one bedroom and the guests will be using his bed while he takes the sofa. So sleepovers were out of the question for the next few weeks. But silly me, I figured that I would at least be invited out to dine or for drinks with these friends. But no, apparently he is embarrassed by me because I've not been included in any of the week’s activities -- oh and I haven't heard from him since Monday either (we exchanged phone calls every night up to this point).

So I'm thinkin', time to move on. Right? I mean, if he is this inconsiderate of my feelings now -- why hang around? Some people have argued, shouldn't you make him aware of your feelings? (you know communicate with him!). My answer is this: Yes communication is key, but common courtesy trumps out on this one. I should not have to point this stuff out!

So there you have it. A non-ANTM related post. Ok So ANTM is actually mentioned 3 times in this post...but give me some credit, it's not about the show.

And yes Virginia (AKA Ethel Waters, AKA Crystal Waters) I will try to post more often.

The Claw-Cam

Well thanks to Cassandra (our favorite beauty queen) tonight's episode of ANTM was -- what they call in the Biz -- a clip show. In episode two, Cassie went back to Texas in search of hair extensions, leaving a big hole in the season for producers to fill.

Fortunately for us, there were hours of out-takes and extra footages to sift through and put together in a special re-cap show.

Lessons learned from this episode:
1) Bringing the outdoors, indoors (girls its just a bird...get over it)
2) Janice D. rules. They could do an entire series just about her.
3) Jayla, mis-understood humorist or just plain crazy?
4) The girls love the confessional room, it should be renamed the "claw-cam". Seriousl girls, don't hold back, tell us how you really feel (sarcasm intended).
5) Top Models learn everything they know from Drag Queens.
6) TV Manipulation 101. So was I the only one to notice that the week that Coryn get booted, that Lisa (her arch enemy) was part of the group hug to wish her well. And then tonight we find out that Coryn had actually apologized for calling her an Alcoholic Bitch -- something left out of that episode. Does this mean that Omrosa is really not a bitch, too?

Special reminder Top Model week is next week...I can't wait to see how bad (or maybe good) the girls can act.

Pouring Salt Into An Open Wound

I don't know why I do these things to myself. Perhaps it's because I am a sadist?

I forced myself to relive the horror of last week's episode of ANTM, when I caught the replay last night. I was devastated, again, that my favorite "Dairy Queen" darling was booted off. And the question of the day is still: Why? Why? Why?

As I said in last weeks post, I just don't get it. I had hoped that this week I would be able to better understand t he madness. But no, I am still fuzzy on why Kyle got the hook.

In a conversation with my girl Miz Mamie today we discussed "Who will it be tonight?" The judges have been uber unpredictable. And I feel that my Model-dar is out of sync. So I can only make a stab that if Bre didn't bring in her "A game" this week, she will be let go tonight. We shall see.