ANTM the Final Entry

Top Model: Cycle 5 is officially over and Nicole was crowned top bitch. I know this news will make some folks happy (yes it’s over and you won’t have to read about ANTM here anymore).

I will admit that this season the show might have “jumped the shark”. I love watching a train wreck as much as the next guy, but seriously the judges were on crack this season.

Some good people were booted out too early in the completion, leaving behind some lack luster choices for the final three.

I’ll admit that Nicole looks like a model. But what is different, unique or individual about her? Nada! And her blasé attitude (What does a girl in the mall say – Like What Ever?!?) really kills me.

As I said, her competition wasn’t that great either. Bre took ok pictures, had the worst ghetto accent ever and was short. On the plus side she did have a big personality.

Nik took nice photographs as well, but in person she was boring. To boot she looked crazy in her Cover Girl photo – her smile was off.

I was asked to today what I thought of the winner…my answer is this I would have rather had Tyra say, “And America’s Next Top Model is…no one, ya'll suck!”

All I Want For Chistmas Is...

I already have my two front teeth, so I thought it would be helpful to let everyone know what is on my holiday wish list this year:

1) A new Job - but you knew that already!
2) A boyfriend - preferably someone successful, smart, handsome (6' tall, buff body, hairy chest)
3) Laptop computer - PC, perhaps a Sony Vio
4) iPod 40GB- time to upgrade to the full version, although I do love my shuffle
5) Black square-toed boots - I am not feeling this pointy shoe thing at all
6) Black suit - As much as I hate wearing one, I should have one in the closet just in case
7) Plasma Screen TV - The larger the better
8) Bed - queen size, pillow-top
9) Jeans - A good fitting pair, to show off my booty, low cut/boot cut
10) New Clothes - everything from socks and underwear to dress slacks and shirts
11) Good will towards men and peace on earth

My night at the OTB Mixer

Sorry to do this to all my loyal readers (LOL) - but I promised someone that I would blog about our outing last night. Funny I should use that word. I was not really at the OTB last night. I was actually at an OTF (Out in TV and Film) mixer. The group is supposed to be made up of people who work in TV and Film, and who are gay. I only meet one of the criteria, but want desperately (as you know) to work TV, so I attend these events to network. Usually, I sit on the sidelines and hang with the same people event after event. But not this time, I made an effort to break from my shell and meet new people.

I met some lovely new folks -- mesmerizing them with my comic timing and witty repartee. My recipe for success is a heavy dose of self-deprecating humor, mixed with equal parts of commentary on the setting and pop culture.

People usually think that I am funny, and I have actually had people suggest that I should do stand up comedy. Unfortunately, I am a flop when it comes to writing down my jokes. My brand of humor is what I like to call "Situational Comedy" (patent pending). I am best making stuff up off-the-cuff. Even now, as I sit down to report on my night, I find it difficult to recreate the jokes, the laughs and the over all good times.

One of the flaws in my system is that "foot in your mouth" situations are bound to happen. For example, when trying to do a funny take on someone's comment about ecstasy (I joked about the drug) of course that person was a recovering addict, clean and sober for 5 year (with the coin to prove it. Unfortunate that I made light of such a serious thing like addiction, but seriously I am still chuckling of that situational comedy! Thankfully the German’s have a word for this, Schadenfreude (Pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others). Someone has to be the butt of a joke, that person is usually me...so I am allowed.